Whether your relationship has broken down or you’re about to get married and you’re considering a pre-nuptial agreement, getting advice from an experienced, qualified family law specialist is your best option.
You will make this decision, no doubt because you think it’s an investment in receiving the right information and support at a momentous time in your life. Financial decisions you make now will affect you for the rest of your life so you will want to make sure that you receive a fair outcome that has involved full consideration of housing, income and pensions. And you will be aware that you need to pay for it. So, you may well be thinking about how to get the most out of your first meeting with your solicitor. How do you prepare?
First things first, choose your solicitor wisely. These are the things we advise you consider when you’re looking for a family law solicitor:
- Choose a family law specialist solicitor and consider using a firm that specialises only in family law. You wouldn’t see your GP for a specialist heart diagnosis – you want a trained and experienced cardiologist.
- Be confident that you can build a good working relationship with your solicitor. So, you’re looking for someone who listens and hears your problems, and they will give you strong guidance if and when it’s required.
- Make sure your solicitors are a member of Resolution. Belderbos Solicitors are a member of Resolution, which means we’ve committed to resolving relationship disputes in a constructive manner, outside of court wherever possible.
- At the same time, select a firm with plenty of experience about how the courts work – especially if you think your split could get acrimonious further down the line.
- Ensure your solicitor has a deep understanding of how the mediation process works. They will be better placed to guide you through the process and increase your chances of achieving the best result, whatever process you use.
- Get a feel, if you can, for how efficient your solicitor will be. This can be tricky to judge at first, and it may take one or two meetings, but it starts with how your first few contacts are handled. A quick and efficient solicitor will help you keep the costs down.
How do I prepare for my first meeting with my family lawyer?
Ok, you’ve chosen your solicitor. Now, for the first meeting. How do you get the most from that first encounter with your lawyer? Here are some tips:
- Consider what you want to gain from the meeting – a smart investment in time is to think about what you would like to take away from your first conversation. Are you hoping to get a broad understanding of all the options open to you for your divorce? Is your priority to sort out childcare arrangements? Do you want to find out more about mediation? Whatever you do, don’t walk away from your first meeting kicking yourself for not mentioning an important matter. What are the things preying most on your mind? It’s always a good idea to compile a list of questions that you would like to ask.
- Take a trusted family member or friend with you - after your first meeting, you will probably benefit from being able to talk through the advice you were given with someone you trust. For this reason, it can be a good idea to take someone with you to that first meeting. A good family lawyer will not mind this because they will want you to make the most of the service they are providing.
- Ask your solicitor if you need paperwork for the first meeting – sooner or later, your solicitor may want to see financial and property documents, a marriage certificate if applicable, birth certificates of children involved and any relevant correspondence with your ex-partner. At the start of a family law process, it’s always a good idea to gather your important documents into one safe space and have them ready for your advisor.
- Prepare a timeline and key dates – alongside the documents, it is also useful for your solicitor to have a chronology of your relationship and the breakdown. For example, when did you begin cohabiting? When did you get married? When did you make a verbal agreement on your childcare arrangements? This is all useful information and helps your solicitor paint a fuller picture of your circumstances.
- Be prepared to discuss private information – some people find the family law process uncomfortable because they are discussing details about their private life with someone they have just met. Client confidentiality is a central part of family law because a) it’s simply the right thing to practise, and b) trust is so important to achieving a successful outcome. Don’t worry, be open and honest and trust your new advisor. They are on your side, and they need as much information as possible to get the best possible results for you.
- Enter into the process with an open mind – it is so often the case that we don’t know what we don’t know. Most of us have little idea of the choices open to us through the family law process, so a relationship breakdown is often followed by a crash course in the many various options available. You would not be alone if you approached your first meeting with your solicitor with a determination to take your ex-partner to court. More often than not, however, the best solution rests outside of a courtroom. Mediation and arbitration, for example, are just two examples of the different routes open to you. Stay calm and be open-minded about the best approach for you.
- Take the time to reflect – you do not need to make all the decisions in that first meeting. Give yourself the time and space to reflect on the first meeting with your solicitor and the advice you have been given. Your solicitor will let you know if they think that any urgent action is needed.
Is my first meeting with a family lawyer free?
No, not always. Some solicitors will start to charge you from the first meeting. This is worth checking before you meet so you’re not hit with an unexpected bill.
At Belderbos Solicitors, the last thing we want is to give you the extra worry of unknown legal costs. We always consult our clients from the outset with a free exploratory call for no fee to make sure we hit the ground running when you instruct us.
Once we’ve agreed to an initial meeting with a member of our team suitable for your case, we will arrange it. Before that, we will ask you to complete a questionnaire. This questionnaire will provide us with a report that we will consider carefully before our first meeting in person. Reading that report, based on your answers, will enable us to have a greater understanding before we meet.
There is no cost to you for that preparation but we will charge for the time with us in that initial meeting.
Why choose Belderbos Solicitors?
We have a clear set of principles that guide us, born out of a determination to do the very best for our clients. In our experience, when a relationship breaks up and emotions run high, people focus on the here and now rather than the best possible resolution for the future. Especially when children are involved, our advice is always to consider your family’s long-term interests.
Our aim is to make your separation or divorce as simple as possible and remove the stresses that can get in the way of addressing the issues you wish to overcome.
So, we favour a kinder approach to resolving family matters. One that helps people to move on, rather than create more ill feeling. At the same time, we know from many years’ experience that every family situation is unique and requires empathy. That means a deep understanding of what our client is going through.
In short, these are our guiding principles:
- Seek the kindest resolution in the best interests of you and the children
- To listen and treat you in an empathetic way
- To guard your time and act in the most time-efficient way
Choose to book a first meeting with Belderbos Solicitors if you want an experienced specialist solicitor in family law who cares about you and your family’s future.
